Can you learn to be emotionally intelligent? These 6 skills are all you need


What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence is a set of abilities that help us perceive and understand the way we and others feel in almost any situation. These abilities, once learned, can help regulate and manage emotions.

Why is emotional intelligence so important?

A person with high emotional intelligence can quickly understand charged situations and guide the moment to a better outcome. This allows you to make better decisions and enhance your own daily performance at work and in your personal life.

Why does emotional intelligence matter for leaders?

For individuals in managerial roles, raising your emotional intelligence can also allow you to better understand the people you work with. By recognizing what your employees and coworkers need, you can hear them and provide them with exactly what they need for each of them to succeed. In other words, having high emotional intelligence makes you a better leader.

Can you really learn emotional intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence is something you can learn, develop and grow. Unlike IQ, EI is a skillset that can be trained and honed through a variety of exercises and regular practice. We are trained and certified by the incredible minds at Genos International. All of our coaching strategies and techniques are created and used by Genos, the worldwide leaders in emotional intelligence development.

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“The way we feel influences the way we think, the way we behave, and the way we perform both productively and unproductively.”

The 6 Competencies of Emotional Intelligence

There are 6 competencies. Each one can be learned to help improve your business, your performance at work and your personal relationships.

  1. Self Awareness
  2. Awareness of Others
  3. Empathy and Authenticity
  4. Emotional Reasoning
  5. Emotional Self Management
  6. Inspiring Performance

1. Self Awareness

This skill is a recommended prerequisite for learning the other 5 skills.

Self-Awareness is about being tuned-in to the way you feel and the impact your feelings can have on your decisions, behaviour and performance. People who are emotionally self-aware are conscious of the role their feelings can play in these areas, and are much better equipped to manage this influence effectively.

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2. Awareness of Others 

This skill helps us identify the things that make people feel valued, listened to, cared for, consulted, and understood. 

Awareness of others is about perceiving, understanding and acknowledging the way others feel. It also helps us demonstrate empathy, anticipate responses or reactions, and adjust our behaviour so that it fits well with others.

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3. Empathy and Authenticity

This skill is about expressing, demonstrating, and expressing positive values.

Authenticity is about openly and effectively expressing oneself, honoring commitments and encouraging this behavior in others. It involves honestly expressing specific feelings such as happiness and frustration, providing feedback about the way you feel, and sharing emotions at the right time, to the right degree and, to the right people.

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4. Emotional Reasoning

This skill is about using emotions to make appropriate decisions.

Emotional Reasoning involves considering the feelings of yourself and others combined with important factual information and communicating all of this into a rational decision-making process.

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5. Emotional Self Management

This skill helps people be resilient and manage high work demands and stress rather than being temperamental at work or at home.

Self Management is about using emotions as important criteria to make appropriate decisions. This involves considering the feelings about yourself and others, combined with important factual information, and communicating all of this into a rational decision-making process.

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6. Inspiring Performance

This skill helps create a productive environment for others. It empowers people to operate at their best. 

Inspiring Performance is about positively impacting the way others feel through problem solving, feedback, recognizing and supporting others work. It involves creating a positive working environment for others, helping others find effective ways of responding to upsetting events and effectively helping people resolve issues that are affecting their performance.

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The Most Important Skill We Have

At M. Howley Consulting, we are certified to help you and your team get in touch with your own emotional intelligence and help you understand the emotions of those around you. We can help you recognize and understand the powerful feelings we all have to help you make better decisions about what you need to do and how to do it. Developing these skills can help your sales teams, managers, and executives develop into masters at what they do and incredible leaders — and ultimately grow your business.

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